hey

The way I w feeling w so far is so far removed from how I feel rn.

People just be saying w is going on w them. they always seem to share that around me and that is an honour, it is.

The fact that they always spoke this disturbing cr all the time; it means that they trust me, and take one look at me and want to open up about it in that moment.

Me feeling triggered is something that I don’t want to do. it’s no beuno, just like judging.

Judging is totally no beuno; like racism. If I had anything to say about racism, it w be that I don’t do it as it is no beuno and anyone who does it is no beuno.

This is what has allowed me to see the true intentions of the people saying this sh; mostly kids.

I got so healed that they just felt this energy around me that they wanted to speak. like I’d be on the bus and there’s be this flurry this constant sharing.

This hurt as it became more and more. Then I reached the point of letting go of all judgement, and my mind cleared and I w able to understand the true meaning of w they w saying; and it w just hurt people sounding off.

My loyalty is w them. I validate w they say, my empathy demands that I do so. They are hurt, I care about that.

I suppose that some psychology is right; tho I c get w that we need to validate all our feelings unconditionally; as some of these if not all of these are judgement(s).

I have the therapy group. I just want more of the healing that I have gotten. I now am in reality that much more.

This I am super grateful for. Reality is w makes me feel like a whole person; something I always wanted when being abused by A.

That w the complete opposite, I w so far out of reality. I feel resentful at someone who c do this to me.

This is over now tho, and I have all the reality I need; and like I say, I want more.

The types of things that people say are different to back in the day. People just speak what comes into their head straight away.

For example this girl said looked at me twice that’s a collar.

I’ll translate. Some men feel entitled to a woman, they feel that bc they looked at her it means they own her. So should they come over and try to get w her, they w be abusive, as they are entitled. It w be a struggle to get away from them.

We all k that sexually aggressive people coming onto us is not w we need.

Comments like this, comments where someone has rly felt threatened; these matter to me and I want to hear them, as opposed to think they are about me.

Also Ik that if Ima handle w people say to me then I don’t have cancer, as this tends to be the trend so I so hard want to be able to handle it; that is where therapy comes in.

I start soon, I am super excited

To Therapy

Kirsty